The moment you pull out your lunchbox, flamboyant salad leaves edging to spring out on to your surroundings as you peel the lid off because you’ve stuffed it with as much as you possibly can.
Then there’s always that leaking residue from whatever dressing you’ve decided to acquaint your salad contents with, so this time you have decided to wrap the lunchbox in extra plastic bags. This was a very sensible, practical idea at the time you did it, but now that it’s time to eat amidst the public, it feels like the music has stopped , pass the parcel has landed on YOU, and every breathing soul in the room is watching you unveil and devour your food. Even the ones who aren’t facing you.
All you can think is, “Holy fuck I hope the people sitting near me don’t think the fishy smell is coming from me… Well, it is, but it’s my tuna salad!”.
For a young female, the narrative of eating often goes something like this:
If you eat the unhealthy option i.e. burger, crisps, chocolate, chips, fat-ass triple sandwich – you’re potentially categorised as a fat bitch. You go for the healthier option, you must be on a diet, and the cries of “Oh, don’t be silly, you don’t need to lose weight” echo.
A big problem with going for the healthier option isn’t just social pressures though, it’s also the fact that it is usually obscene in price in comparison to the naughtier options, and also frugal in choice.
So society should back off when bitch be getting her Aldi seasonal salad out for lunch. Being healthy is not the same as being on a diet, and this message deserves greater emphasis. Many people are insecure, especially when they’re young and weight conscious. If healthy food was cheaper and more accessible, then choosing that option wouldn’t set you apart so much.
Whilst fast food chains have noticeably introduced healthier options, the prices are still not as cheap as they should be. Considering going to McDonalds for a salad seems like going to a crack house for vitamins, or a whore house for a hug, you would think it would be cheaper. It really shouldn’t cost this much to eat a f*cking salad!
Photo Credit: sa_ku_ra